apparent time

This post is an extension of the previous one on the apparent self. Please familiarise
yourself with it first.

The idea of the self is inextricably combined with the idea of time. Time is, only when
separate self is (apparently, never actually). The idea of the separate self is a center, the
thinker, and correspondingly a circumference, that which one thinks about, one's knowledge,
the projection of the past. This subject-object relationship is separateness, distance and time.
Time is the distance between thoughts. Thoughts are time associated entities. Do you see?

The projection of the past onto the present as thinking is time; and the projection of the past
knowledge/thinking into an imagined future is also psychological time... again, the self/ego,
knowledge, which is the past, projecting and objectifying itself as the present and future is
apparent time and apparent ego identity - both psychological, linear, associative, apparent
constructs with no actual reality.

The true and actual present/Presence is timeless, quintessential, unassociated, unconditioned
(by knowledge) consciousness/awareness. Thus the wise Moses said, "Make no image of YHVH."


Time is limit. Knowledge is always limited, finite.
Trinity said, "The Matrix cannot tell you who you are."
When I ask, "Who are you?", why do you start thinking?
Thinking cannot tell you who you are.

Jesus said, "Let him who seeks continue seeking until he finds. When he finds, he will become
troubled. When he becomes troubled, he will be astonished, and he will rule over the All."
- The Gospel of Thomas

the apparent separate ego

One of the necessities of "experiencing" Oneness is to "dissolve" twoness.
What is twoness? Self and not-self, subject and object, thinker and thought, etc.
The idea of the individual separate ego is one of the trickiest to unveil, mainly
because we have identified ourselves with this separate ego and try to use it to
unveil itself, which it won't and can't do. Another way we are roped into this
deception is to identify with our thoughts. Let me try to show you, or at least
describe, how this is so. Try to follow this with me - look into yourself. It means
nothing to "understand" this with your reason. You must see it directly.

Answer this question: who are you?

Okay. Don't go too far with that. What I really want you to see is that when you
endeavor to answer this question, or any question, you begin thinking. What is
thinking? It is presently filing or searching through your memories, your knowledge.
Memories and knowledge... do you see this is the past? Your knowledge is what you
already know. It is accumulated and stored as memory. You can't think about some-
thing you don't know - you have no word, no image, no impression of it. So when you
are thinking you are accessing the past. This is important to see because it will bring
you to the present and "automatically" or effortlessly undo twoness. We can't undo
twoness because we want to or because it is wrong or bad or by trying to avoid it or
go towards something else... all these ARE twoness. The "wanter" cannot be there!
You cannot have a separate individual will from the Universal Being of what is!
So any effort on your part will result in twoness. Understand? But seeing what is
directly, that all thought is the past for example, is simply noticing the truth, or what
actually is. It is not an effort to change anything. Let's continue.

So I am endeavoring to point out to you that the ego, or idea of the separate individual
self as a consistent and continuous being (which is how we think of ourselves - stringing
our past memories together into an apparent continuous being who has learned, grown
and changed, but is essentially still "me"... a linear personal history from birth to present,
point A to point B, two very distinct and unrelated points separated by time and space,
yet "magically" associated by memory-knowledge-the past; a past that only exists in our
minds, in our memories, kept "alive" by our re-member-ing. "Re" meaning "done again",
i.e. not new. Is it any wonder that we age when we are rarely ever new, due to continuous
thinking and association/identification with dead past thoughts? Ok, let me try to continue
again.) ...so this idea (and I intend for you to see directly that it is indeed an idea and not
an actual entity) of the separate self/ego is composed of thought, of memory, of knowledge,
of association. Here is what I really want to reveal to you - a great secret and mystery and
tragedy and usurping of spirit: you/we think that you are the thinker having thoughts, as if
you are in control, as if you are the subject, the entity. But watch and see for yourself -
thought has objectified itself as the thinker! You really don't exist.

Forgive me for what I have said. This place is terrible!
But it is said that "fear/awe is the beginning of knowledge, and fools despise wisdom and
instruction." - Proverbs 1:7

Have we not been fools/fooled by our worship of knowledge?
You who claim to love wisdom/chokmah/sophia/sapientia... Isis has never been unveiled
by a mortal! Don't you know you - the illusory idea of the thinker/ego/self - must die to see
Her? Don't you know that Her veil is you? Your apparent existence - "I think, therefore I am" -
is Her death. Your death is Her life. She ate of the tree of knowledge (now do you understand
knowledge?) and was exiled from "the Garden". If you wish to return, you must exile knowledge
to regain (the tree of) Life ("Eve" means "living"; not dead like knowledge).
But you cannot force this exile! You simply see it as the truth; you simply cease seeing/believing
the illusion.

May the All-One shine Its Grace upon you.